September 17

No whining today ! I feel as well as can be expected. Still lots of pain here and there……even had a shot in my hip because Dr. said he thought I had bursitis. Helped a little (I think). My biggest problem is the breathlessness and pain upon walking any distance. So I have to do the things I can do without the physical effort. I have a TENS unit now and that helps a lot.
I hate shopping online, but I think I better get used to it as walking around stores is out of the question.
Anyway……poetry is the goal.
I thought I’d share something a little different today. I’m going to post a poem that I wrote when I was 11 years old. My first poem I think, at least the oldest surviving one. Then I’m going to post a poem I wrote a short time ago.

Here’s the 11 year old:

A funny animal is sitting.
By him sits his little brother.
Crying hard, he sits and sniffles.
Drying eyes-his little brother.
Every animal must have his cry
For the boys have lost their mother.
Go and bring to me our father
He commands his little brother.
In no time at all he scampers,
Joyfulness all now has left him.
Kangaroos jump out of hiding.
Lose his way? Oh, no, he musn’t!
Mother now is all his thoughts.
Nose all wrinkled up a’sniffing,
Oh the trail is hard to follow!
Presently he bursts on father.
Queer that he should find him here.
Right away he tells the story.
Slowly, sadly, father follows
To the place where he left brother.
Under rays of gleaming sunlight
Very slowly he approaches.
Were he’d never seen this day!
Xerxes could not have been sadder
Yielding to the Greek’s great power.
Zebras watch from far away as they
kneel beside the grave.

The newer one is about our iconic NM chile. Talk about addictions! Once you have it you will go to almost any lengths to make sure you get your fix!


Sunny skies clear as a bell
and in the air the pungent smell

of chiles roasting all over town,
tumbling in barrels round and round

until the skin will peel right off
and the chile pod is roasted and soft.

Chile for burgers, beans, and rellenos,
chile for enchiladas and tacos.

No matter where New Mexicans roam
when they return they feel at home

when they encounter that mouthwatering smell,
for chile’s been harvested and all is well.


August 25


Oh see it with me !
Mountains blue, misty, or rosy,
sunsets red and gold and pink,
forests green, tall trees reaching up
into blue blue never ending skies.

But wait–there’s more than that–
there’s beauty in a friendly smile,
a caring touch,
a wrinkled face and snowy hair,
a little child with trusting eyes,
a table set with thanks and love,
or a baby’s coo.

And oh ! There’s beauty in
well-written lines,
in deep emotions spilled on paper,
in marvelous music that moves to tears,
and in your face as
you look at me with love.

This poem I wrote because of memories of a special cherry tree that I loved to climb and sit hidden among it’s leafy branches when I was a child.

first my shiny green leaves fell off
and I felt naked
snow fell and I shivered
in the cold and wind.

but the snow melted and I felt the sun again
soon the man who planted me
came with shears and saw
to cut off some of my branches

I looked down one day
and saw small green shoots
they grew longer and
I felt encouraged

the man brought his children
to see my new growth
he told them to watch and one day
I would wear a lovely white gown

the sun came more often to
warm my branches and
encourage my tiny buds to open
until I was covered in blooms

the children came and marveled
at my beauty once again
they climbed into my welcoming arms
and I was renewed in the circle of life.

August 10

I’m almost done with my weeks of therapy and I can’t say I think it has done a lot of good. Same old pain. In fact, this morning, after I left therapy, I thought I had dislocated my hip. The pain lasted for most of the day and I could scarcely walk. So much for therapy !
That’s my latest whine. The best thing to do seems to be to distract myself somehow, which does more good than anything. When I am busy writing or playing, or visiting with friends, the pain goes to the back of my consciousness.


the neighborhood wakes slowly
birds chirp undisturbed as seniors
stroll or sip their coffee,
yesterday’s heat forgotten.

pets walk happily here,
so close yet far from
the bustle of the downtown market
where dogs dodge crowds
in a confusion of legs streaming by.

here birdsongs are clearly heard
while the slightest of breezes
makes gnarled old trees
look askance at one another,
each unique although
standing for many years together
like neighbors who never left home.


after the rains the sage becomes
a proliferation of purple,
bursting out in a
joy of beauty,
ephemeral, and thus
more precious,
like pleasures that come
once a lifetime.

July 29

As I get older I revel in memories of those special times that meant the most to me in my life. My regrets include not having a chance to travel to Europe often, but my one trip to Ireland was so incredible that those memories bring me huge pleasure yet.


One time I stood where mother stood,
where family roots reached from the land
to entwine their stories round my heart.

One time I felt connection like no other,
belonging, a rightness of place, feeling a shiver
of welcoming family phantoms crowding round.

One time only I had a chance to be
where fiddlers play and leprechauns dance
with sheep that graze on green carpeted hills.

One time only did history feel so alive to me,
so much a part of my present, and my past.
My heart is blessed with joyous memories.

Oh to be just one more time on that fabled isle
where forty shades of green could sooth my soul
and welcome me to heaven.


Remember the little bedtime prayer that everyone knows?….
Now I lay me down……..
Here’s one for adults:


At night I lay me down in bed
to rest my aching back and head,
to sleep, to sleep, perchance to dream
of things that are not as they seem.
For when I wake, dreams flee away,
disgruntled at the light of day.

July 17,’17

Hi everyone.
I have been to an osteopath and I am going to like him. He tried manual manipulation on my back last week, but said he couldn’t do me much good because my sternum is “frozen”. Doesn’t turn in all directions as it is supposed to.
So now I will be going to therapy for about 5 weeks. I am in hopes they can help. At least the cause of my hip and leg pain has been diagnosed properly (I hope!). I always said I hurt more when I have to walk or stand; turns out there was a reason for that.
Anyway, life goes on and I’m still getting around. Can’t do all the things I would like, but I’m trying not to complain. Others are much worse off. Last week 3 of my friends had surgery on the same day……one was for cancer, one for kidney stones, and the other for a broken hip. So when I feel sorry for myself I think of them.

My Self

My self is a mindless bird that sees
in the window glass another bird.

I fly to that other, but rather than
a joyful meeting
I smash my self against the reality of my ego

and lie broken and breathless on the ground.

I Cannot Abide Cold

cold feet, cold hands,
cold days, or
cold eyes

keep me cozy please
wrapped in sweaters and throws
happily snuggling a day away

banish ice cream, ice cubes
and ice cold beer

I wish to be far from icebergs
ski trails
and snowmen.

but even farther away
from iced people

July 2nd

A belated Happy Canada Day to my Canadian friends and relatives! Most of you know that I have never given up my Canadian citizenship. I said something the other day to a friend who didn’t know that…I said I wished I could return to live in Canada. She said it might not be that easy to move up there, and I said, Oh they have to let me in. I’m a citizen of the Great Country to the North. And proud of it.
There are reasons why I never became a citizen of the USA. After all these years, (57), why bother. Besides, I have always been appalled, from the time I first arrived in Indiana to go to college, at the arrogance of the American people. They think everyone in the world wants to be an American citizen and that they are the best at everything.
PBS is running a series of shows about the history of China. It is very interesting to think that China has thousands of years of history, culture and tradition while the USA is a comparative baby. And yet it seems to me that Americans look at China as somehow less intelligent, somehow less advanced. Strange.
These things are in my thoughts as this weekend is the 4th of July holiday. I confess that I tire of the rampant patriotism on display every year on the 4th. Everyone loves the country of their birth and every country has a unique culture and perspective. We should respect that.

Here is a poem I wrote 11 years ago and it is still relevant.
What do you do in 30,000 square feet?
there must be rooms
you never use,
Ceilings so high, with heat rising
and rising and rising
using massive quantities of fuel
To feed an ego bolstered by
a six-figure income
and some economic power.
Why do you need to impress?
who is there who in the end
will count you righteous for your greed?

What do you do in 600 square feet?
there must be a window somewhere
for you to feel the sun,
And old chair where you could put your feet up
to count the pennies
left from you social security check
And find a way to pay for
the little bit of heat you need
to make it through the winter.
Who do you have to live for?
who is there who in the end
will give you pity for your poverty?

June 20

Apparently I have hips that are, to quote the doctor, “totally out of whack”. So on Thursday of this week I will get a steroid shot in my SI joint which should help with my pain, which seems to me to get worse every day.
It will be a little while until I know for sure that the shot has helped and then the doctor will send me to therapist, who, he assures me, is excellent and will target the therapy to what I need.
I feel better just knowing there is a little help in sight.

Too bad that the world is feeling so much pain too. There are so many reasons for the state the world finds itself in, but one of things that is most dismaying to me is the billions spent on war and armaments. What a waste of resources. What if parents spent most of their money stockpiling weapons and said they had no money left over to feed and clothe and give health care to their children?
Anyway, here is a poem that came out of my reflecting on the huge military base near me called the White Sands Missile Range where weapons of destruction are tested.


I am sitting under a bowl of perfect blue sky
on a hillside east of the Organs.
I see a line of distant hills and a green plain,
a vista that stretches for miles, and, over all,
a blanket of blowing dust.

There is a white ribbon near the horizon,
which I know to be a mystery of shifting sands.

A cooling breeze blows over me,
trying in vain to blow away
my thoughts of what is really below.
for it is a valley of death,
a place accepted because its jobs bless the economy
while it curses mankind with weapons.

There must always be new weapons,
new ways to kill,
new ways to be top dog,
to rule the world,
to smother love and mercy.

And so the dusty mist tries to conceal reality
just as clouds of unconcern blur our minds

and the wind blows on,
moving the sands tiny grain by tiny grain,
toward oblivion.

June 17

Well, the plague of Southwest June is here. Today it will get up to 107 degrees F. I’m staying home.

And the news goes on, if you can dignify it as news. It is like a terrible accident, you are appalled, but somehow you can’t look away. Sometimes I listen to TV news and sometimes I get my news from political cartoons or clips from late night TV. You can find them on YouTube. Way more satisfying. At least one can laugh. I just finished reading a great book titled, “Dark Money”. Every American should read it. Although it is very scary it explains a lot.

I see a orthopedic doctor on Monday. Hoping for some answers. I’m trying to put it all in perspective……….


I was enjoying a relaxing evening
with a plate of colorful, delicious
vegetables upon my lap
and then a pea fell into my slipper.

Life was, in general, good
and placid until into my family
strode a killer with a capital C
and then a pea fell into my slipper.

I had a dear and special friend
who was my alter ego, but
one day she suddenly was gone
and a pea fell into my slipper.

My body stayed healthy for many years
my strength a source of pride,
but then aging took over, my body slowed,
while a pea fell into my slipper.

None of these problems belonged in my life !
I struggled to understand why, until
my pain appeared in proper perspective
as only a pea in my slipper.

June 3

Well, I got the test results from the neurosurgeon on Wednesday. The good news is I don’t require another surgery. The bad news is that I got no information other than that from him. Once a surgeon decided that he isn’t going to get to do a surgery on you, he loses interest. He seemed in a big hurry and I didn’t get to question him further.
He gave me referrals to an orthopedic Dr. and to pain management. I’ll have to see the orthopedist first. What I really want is answers as to where the pain is coming from and what is causing it. I suppose I’ll have to wait more weeks to see that Dr. It is a circle of pain and despair, trying to get the help you need from the medical system. I just thank God I have good insurance. If it wasn’t for that, I’d be unable to afford all these tests and appointments.
So I don’t have more to say than that. The pain in my upper back gets worse….pain in the SI joint and hip lessen if I rest a lot.
Just trying to keep going and not get down and discouraged.
The poem today kind of says how I feel about my body….I’d be glad to leave it behind.


You have been so long a part of me,
but now you draw away.

You refuse to do the things I enjoy,
sulking like a dying love.

I feel I’m losing you.
Soon we shall part—oh yes!

You see, I can live without you,
but you cannot live without me.

I shall be set free from
the prison of your limitations.

For many years you served me well, but
now you offer restrictions and excuses.

So you must be less important now.
My spirit will take me the rest of the way.

May 17

I saw the neurosurgeon yesterday. We only talked,so there isn’t anything I can tell you at this point. He has ordered X-rays and an MRI of my back, so until he sees those, nothing to report.

He is located in El Paso, which is about a 45 minute drive. It is hard for me to sit in the car for a long time, which is why I’ve put off taking a jaunt up to Albuquerque to visit old friends. 45 minutes was not bad, but still, I’m not sure I want to try a longer trip. To Albuq. takes me at least 3 and a half hours, or more because I have to stop often. I was so hoping to visit friends in northern NM this summer, so am hoping for some pain relief before the nice weather ends up there. (They live at 8500 ft. altitude!)

This reflects my thinking on travel right now…………..


I only travel in my mind,
leaving car and plane trips behind.

How lovely it would be to go
to places I’ve not been before.

But I can always go to play
in exotic places far away

when I join an author in Timbuktu
or learn of the Inca way down in Peru.

I read of the pearl fishing in Bahrain
and traditional celebrations in Spain.

My TV helps me travel too, you know,
to every place I would like to go.

Alas, I’m here in my old armchair
regretting that I cannot go anywhere.

But places I’ve been still beckon me
to revisit them often in memory